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Matt Stone and Trey Parker rule my world. Even though Isaac Hayes quit the show due to the whole making-fun-of-Scientology thing, they aren’t letting that spell and end to his Chef character: ‘South Park’ Cooks Up Plan For Chef In Season Premiere

Details on the episode were scarce as of press time — Chef returns to town, but his erratic behavior worries Stan, Kyle, Cartman and Kenny — though Comedy Central did confirm that contrary to previous reports, Hayes will provide the voice for Chef, however all his lines will be taken from previously recorded material.

I love it! You just know the “erratic behavior” will consist of every phrase sounding like it comes from a completely different context, making the cut-and-paste job completely obvious.

The very best part, though is the press release from Stone & Parker:

Stone and Parker are refusing to let the whole thing go, issuing a statement to Daily Variety that pokes fun not only at Hayes and Cruise, but Scientology as a whole.

“So, Scientology, you may have won this battle, but the million-year war for Earth has just begun!” the statement read. “Temporarily anozinizing our episode will not stop us from keeping Thetans forever trapped in your pitiful man-bodies. Curses and drat! You have obstructed us for now, but your feeble bid to save humanity will fail! Hail Xenu!!!”

Absolutely heroic! Personally, I feel a need for the boys to do an Orgazmo-style movie based on all the info at Operation Clambake.

Update: Isaac Hayes may not be the bad guy here.