Being a hockey fan was my way of seeming special. So I hope when the NHL comes back, probably not until 2007, it doesn’t try to revamp itself for the masses. There are lots of suggestions: making the goals bigger or the goalie pads smaller; getting rid of the red line; eliminating fighting; having monkeys drive Zambonis; putting strippers in the penalty box. Some of those ideas might be mine.
Oh, no… Keep the Simianistas away from our Zamboni technology, son.
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